Facial Feminisation Surgery

IMG_1564A friend who is in transition and who just got her legal right to change her name and gender on her ID card told me about this site: http://www.virtualffs.co.uk/ It is both a site with a wealth of information on Facial Feminisation Surgery (FFS) but also provides an interesting service: by uploading some pictures of yourself, the site owner, Alexandra Hamer, can create a ‘virtual’ version of yourself after FFS. She claims that the results would be 80% approximate to what you could realistically expect from the state-of-the-art of FFS (assuming, of course, good surgeons who know exactly what they’re doing). Hamer, trained as an artist, has a thesis (also online) about FFS, having studied the subject very deeply and worked with lots of surgeons to understand what exactly can be done with FFS, and, as such, she’s a well-known adviser for people in transition — telling them what is reasonable to expect, and aiding them with images and suggestions that they can consult with their surgeons.

I’ve actually taken a few pictures of myself, to see what Hamer would do with them, but I guess it’s too expensive for me — I’ll save the money for some new breast forms instead! 😀

One thing that Hamer points out is that some extreme expectations (which later become a source of frustration and utter disappointment in the results) might be a delusional form of believing oneself to be ‘too ugly’ to pass as female. This condition is known as body dysmorphic disorder (BDD). I can very well believe that I suffer from at least a mild variant of that, but, of course, it is undiagnosed. BDD and GID often go hand-in-hand for obvious reasons, but the truth is that many people I know who are in transition, don’t really suffer from BDD. They’re happy with the way they look; they’re, however, extremely unhappy about their assigned gender and are taking steps to change it.

In fact, while I think I look ugly both as a male or as a female, I also think that a lot of transgendered people, many of which are in transition, look even uglier. But what always fascinates me is how little they worry about it, while I obsess about my looks all the time. So maybe I’m tackling my own issues in the worst possible way.

Clearly, if I ever went into transition, I would refuse to do the Real Time test unless I got some FFS first. The body can be successfully padded to look feminine; I worry far less about that, since I wouldn’t be going swimming during the Real Time test, but remain fully clothed until my body responded to hormones — and some surgery on top of that too, of course. But FFS, for me, would always be a must. At least, that nose, chin and jaws must go. I can live with the rest.

  • Emily S. Lopes

    hey, this is Emily again, I just wanted to say or suggest that you should not change a thing about the way that you are, I love you exactly the way you are, flaws and everything and God made you this way, even with the obscessions that I share with you(taking hundreds of pictures of Emily at a time in one session)- so don't change a thing about yourself, unless you really decide to change your gender, then this is a whole different conversation. I noticed that your discussions have been more centered torwards this, are you flirting with the idea, or really going to take steps to transition. when I considered it I went to a clinic and they said I could get hormone therapy with in three months, and didn't need to consult a phd, then I did my research and saw that if I strated taking hormones, I would have to keep taking them for the rest of my life, even after transition, so this flirting is pretty serious, I hope you and your wife are open to this possibility, I know you and her have issues ect, like any married couple have.

  • J

    I relate very much to this article.
    Thank you.
    I am beginning transition on hrt and I’m extremely
    Worried about my face not looking feminine. In short I agree
    That ffs is a must for me also once hrt has done all it can.
    I’m also worried that my BDD may be pushing me into hrt and
    That I’m not really just transgender but instead I’m simply queer and looking
    For a way to “fix” my face.
    Thank you so much for sharing.

    • Thanks for your comment! I\’m obviously not a doctor, or an expert, and as such I\’m not qualified to give you any advice, but I would think that you ought to discuss that point with your therapist — that you might not be transgendered but just wishing to have a more feminine face.

      Depending on where you live, you might be entitled to HRT and FFS even if you don\’t want to \’live as a woman\’ but are merely looking for a solution for your BDD. Also, depending on your degree of BDD, HRT/FFS might not be a \’permanent cure\’, e.g. you might still feel the need to do further improvements; but your therapist can point out to some techniques to deal with that…

      Beyond that, I can only say that you should always evaluate what doctors say and what you wish. If your doctor/therapist claims that the only way for you to get a more feminine face is to go through transition, then you really, really should ask a second opinion, especially if you\’re not very interested in the transition itself, just in the results of HRT and FFS.

%d bloggers like this: